An Abstract on Rise of Assumptions in Exopolitical Mediation
By Cyrellys Geibhendach
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My Website: Compass Morainn
It is amazing how difficult we make human interactions when we use assumptions within environments in which the adherence and protection of the integrity of details is so incredibly important to the disclosers and to the long-term effects of the information beyond the original communication event. The relationship between exopolitical mediators and the participants in their mediation depends on the objective receipt, relay, & extrapolation of facts. In a tenuous inter-group social climate which ensconces the parties involved, any misunderstandings which result from assumptions can cause those communication events to literally fall apart as stress levels shred the veins of trust built through the act of mediation.
There has always been a limit of tolerance for disbelief, fact-twisting, emotional-grandstanding, and sensationalizing no matter which end or version of the participant spectrum is involved. Participant sensitivity, particularly when Insiders or Whistleblowers are involved, is rife with communication apprehension. The importance of cognitive listening is rarely understood by public observers or public participants in particular. Cognitive listening is the opposite of assuming. It is the mental process of understanding and remembering another’s message clearly and concisely.
The benefits of cognitive listening are the same as they are in other relationships. Lorna Doone of the blog “Something Good” wrote the following series of articles in which she explains that assumptions can be avoided by asking questions and verifying or clarifying the responses by asking them once again:
The Four Agreements Part Four: Don't Make Assumptions
Part One - An Introduction
Part Two - Be Impeccable With Your Word
Part Three - Don't Take Anything Personally
Part Four - Don't Make Assumptions
Part Five - Always Do Your Best
In part four, “Don’t Make Assumptions,” she gives a very nice list of the benefits of cognitive listening without defining the term as the opposite to the making and use of assumptions. She says, “This actually has a lot of benefits. First of all, you’re spending more time actually communicating with those you care about. They are able to see that you are willing to take time and effort to really listen to what they have to say. Secondly, you are going to be able to avoid a lot of stress and drama by not making assumptions. Finally, you can help create a great example for how you want to be treated. In fact, you can use your new-found ability to ask questions in order to let others know what you want in life.”
In exopolitical mediation, the participants are communicating for the very purpose of expressing what they want in life. Therefore the leap to assume which is a natural human tendency or habit inhibits this form of communication. This use of assumptions occurs during the maturation phase or middle phase of relationship development in which the participants learn each other’s idiosyncratic nature and develop a sense of identity through symbolic labels of the relationship. The assumptions are synonymous or indicative of the labels that are being developed. It might therefore be suggested that the participant’s inherent understanding of the information providers involved may be flawed. It may be useful to return to that foundation introduction for a revitalization of that understanding or to modify the interaction to expound and improve upon the perception of the information provider(s) among them.
It is within the Mediator’s legitimate power to direct the conversation where improvements in or reiteration of information, or even the use of mnemonic devices may assist the participants to more appropriately and accurately recall or understand information in the way it was intended. The assigning of symbolic labels or connotative meaning to information given will elicit a personal emotional response on the part of the information giver(s). The mediator can work through the detriments of assumptive responses or returns on given information by developing a cooperative strategy with willing participants that is complimentary to the communication purposes early on, fully understanding that this occurrence is not atypical in exopolitical mediation.